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Man raised as a girl learns at 19 he was born intersex and surgically altered as a baby by his parents

Man raised as a girl learns at 19 he was born intersex and surgically altered as a baby by his parents

Jim realised he was born intersex when he was in college as a young adult / The Secret of Me/ Multitude Media

For the first 19 years of his life, Jim Ambrose believed he was a girl named Kristi. He grew up in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, raised by loving parents, playing sport, excelling at football and spending most of his time outdoors. Yet even as a teenager, there was a persistent sense that something did not fit. Kristi was a self-described tomboy, uncomfortable in feminine clothes, confused by expectations placed on her body and behaviour. Her mother insisted on dresses and even had her hair permed. At the time, Jim recalls, it all seemed normal, there was no framework to question it, and nothing had ever been explained.

Kristi

For nineteen years, Jim Ambrose lived as Kristi, believing himself a girl shaped by other/ Youtube

What he did not know was that, as an infant born in 1976, he had undergone medically recommended surgery after doctors determined his genitalia fell outside what they considered an “acceptable” male or female norm. His parents were told this was the best course of action. Jim was raised as a girl, without being told why.

The moment everything unravelled

The truth emerged during Jim’s first year of college. Sitting in a feminist studies class, he began leafing through a reading he had not prepared. The discussion in the room caught his attention. “I started flipping through the book and I started reading about how some children are born with genitals that fall outside an arbitrary acceptable norm,” he said on The Secret of Me, which aired on Channel 4 on 20 January.

A still from The Secret of Me documentary.

A still from The Secret of Me documentary. Image: The Secret of Me/ Multitude Media

“It’s measured, you know, this length, you get to be a boy, this less than that, you get to be a girl.” As the explanation continued, about infants losing their phallus, about parents and doctors deciding a child’s sex for them, recognition set in. Jim realised the passage was describing him. He rushed to obtain his medical records and opened them alone in his car. “I start at the top and immediately it says ‘carrier type, XY’. And I’m like, wait, what the f**k is that… why are they running chromosome tests on me?”

XY

He discovered he had XY chromosomes after reading about intersex bodies and checking his medical records.

Jim learned that he was born intersex, with XY chromosomes, and that surgery had been performed in infancy to make his genitals appear female. The knowledge landed all at once, reshaping every memory of his childhood.

Medicine, decisions, and lasting harm

The surgery had been carried out by Dr Richard Carter, who also appears in the documentary. He recalled seeing “an infant that had ambiguous genitalia,” explaining that ‘ambiguous genitalia’ is a condition where it is not clear whether a baby’s genitalia is male or female. “In 1976 the medical world thought was that these patients needed to be surgically constructed the way they most likely looked,” he said. “This was strictly an anatomical decision because it was so much easier to make it look like a clitoris than trying to make it look like a penis.” Jim later learned that his testes had been removed. From the age of around 11, he was put on oral oestrogen to induce female puberty, breast development and typical female fat distribution, without being told what the medication was doing or why.

christy

As a teenager, she was prescribed tablets without explanation, later learning they were oestrogen to induce female puberty/ Image: Youtube Secret of me

“I was told at that time that at some point in the future I would have to have a vagina constructed on my body so my husband can have sex with me,” Jim said in an interview with Big Issue. “Notice the language. It’s not: ‘You’ll be able to experience sexual pleasure with the man of your choice.’” After discovering the truth, Jim stopped taking hormones for several years. Doctors later told him he would need to resume oestrogen or begin testosterone. He chose testosterone, saying it was the first time he felt at home in his body. He later underwent a double mastectomy, describing it as an attempt to “decolonise” his body after decades of medical control.

Anger, activism, and unfinished questions

The revelation triggered deep anger, toward his parents, toward the doctors, and toward a system that made irreversible decisions without his consent. Jim said he had been bullied throughout childhood for his appearance and endured “so much unnecessary suffering.” Archive recordings included in The Secret of Me show his parents, Alice and John, explaining they believed they were acting in their child’s best interests, following medical advice available at the time. Today, Jim lives with the long-term psychological impact but says he is happy with his partner, Yvonne. He has stepped back from public activism in recent years but agreed to reopen his story for the documentary, which was directed by Grace Hughes-Hallett.

jam

Jim Ambrose and his partner Yvonne. Image: Jim Ambrose via Big Issue

The film notes that around one in 2,000 babies are born with genital differences that place them at risk of surgical intervention, and that so-called “corrective” surgeries still take place in most countries worldwide. There is no specific law in the UK banning such procedures on intersex infants.

The Secret of Me – Official Trailer

Reflecting on his experience, Jim said: “That’s what happens when you wound children in a unique and specific way. They stop having a relationship with that part of their body. It belongs to the surgeon or belongs to the parents.” For him, discovering the truth at 19 did not just explain his past, it reframed it entirely. Go to Source

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