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‘Was so angry and jealous of Tabu for winning the National award,’ recalls Sonali Kulkarni

'Was so angry and jealous of Tabu for winning the National award,' recalls Sonali Kulkarni: 'When I watched her films, it helped me deal'

Tabu is known for being one of the best actresses in Hindi cinema, who has won several awards along with critical acclaim, also including the National Award. Tabu had won the Best Actress for Gulzar’s ‘Maachis’ which released in 1996. At that point, Sonali Kulkarni was also a contender for it for her acclaimed performance in Amol Palekar’s ‘Daayra’. In a recent interview, Sonali confessed being jealous and angry when Tabu won. Tabu received her first National Award for Best Actress in 1997 for ‘Maachis’, a milestone that marked her transition from being known primarily as a commercial star, thanks to films like ‘Coolie No. 1’ (1991) and ‘Jeet’ (1996), to being recognised as one of Indian cinema’s finest performers.“Every year, my films were considered as the best chosen films in the final rounds of the National Awards. And every year after year, I was getting disappointed. And that was the time when I really wanted a National Award. I was winning others, but what you don’t get, you crave for that the most,” she explained in an interview with Screen. Recalling her reaction after Tabu’s victory, Sonali said she tried to rationalise the outcome by telling herself, “She’s from the industry na! That was a very famous line,” referring to Tabu being the niece of veteran actor Shabana Azmi. She confessed, “I was so angry and jealous of Tabu that I finally went and watched ‘Maachis’. When I watched her films, it helped me deal with the insecurities or the desperation I had.”However, watching Tabu’s work proved to be a turning point. Instead of fuelling resentment, the performance left her deeply impressed.“She argued that Tabu’s performance in ‘Maachis’ was “so sleek” that it calmed her down. “Her performance not only gave me joy, but also had so much command it helped me come to terms with my own life and abilities. When I watched many films of Tabu, including ‘Maachis’, ‘Astitva’ (2000), and ‘Chandni Bar’ (2001), I fell in love with her every time,” adds the actor.Over time, Sonali says her obsession with winning the National Award faded as her understanding of acting evolved.“At the beginning of your career, you want to perform all your emotions with intensity. You don’t know what’s subtlety. It’s now that I’m understanding what it’s to be subtle, what the difference is between theatre acting and film acting. So, I have no complaints now. I’ve come to terms with myself, more than anything else,” says Sonali.The actor also revealed that Tabu wasn’t the only contemporary she envied. She admitted feeling jealous of Nandita Das after the latter was cast by Mani Ratnam in the 2002 Tamil film ‘Kannathil Muthamittal’. Ironically, it was Mani Ratnam who had recommended Sonali for her Tamil debut in ‘May Maadham’ (1994), but the celebrated filmmaker never cast her in any of his own directorial ventures. Tabu, on the other hand, collaborated with him in the acclaimed political drama ‘Iruvar’ (1997).Sonali eventually received National Award recognition in 2002, winning the Special Jury Award for Kranti Kanade’s Marathi short film ‘Chaitra’. Today, however, her ambitions have changed. Rather than chasing accolades, she hopes to one day share screen space with the very actor she once envied.“I really hope so. Tabu and Aish got to work together in ‘Kandukondain Kandukondain’. Lovely songs and fabulous performances,” said Sonali, referring to Rajiv Menon’s 2000 Tamil romantic musical. Sonali later shared screen space with Aishwarya Rai in Gurinder Chadha’s 2004 film ‘Bride and Prejudice’. Go to Source

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